My haitus

Wow, I can't believe that it's been more than two months since I've written here. So much has happened since then -- not the least of which is cutting another 10 minutes off my half marathon time.

I'm still chugging along, but now it seems I'm chugging with a little more ease, a little more speed and a little more confidence.

I've even decided to have another go at the Hampton Half Marathon in February. Yes, that's the one that I swore I would never do again after running 13.1 miles in the cold and wet snow last year.

I'm still hoping for good weather for that one on Feb. 15. Will make for a much more enjoyable race.

Speaking of weather, Mother Nature is throwing another good one at us as I write this... and Coach Jack's even decided to cancel practice, something he rarely does. ("Can't pick the weather on race day," he reminds us.)

But when the conditions become too dangerous for us to run on the roads, Coach Jack makes the call to cancel.

Tomorrow was to be the 10-miler for the new Disney team. I was looking forward to running it with Sarah and celebrating her accomplishment.

We'll still do it. New England weather is just delaying that celebration until next week.

Maine Marathon Weekend

Had a great time at the Maine Marathon weekend -- and will be sure to write more on it later. For now, enjoy a few pix from the weekend by using this link:

www.facebook.com/album.php?aid=33984&l=ac2b5&id=576969690

Some pix from Scott's 40th

Hampster Wheel

I'm not yet used to these shorter days. I prefer to run in the evenings, when busy families are shuffling kids to and from various practices, cooking dinner and running around with other errands.

I like changing out of my work clothes, lacing up my shoes and using the miles to get away the stress of everyday life and out of work-mode.

But lately I can't seem to keep up with the diminishing daylight. I can no longer take my time when I get home from work.

Yesterday was no exception.

Sometimes when I know I'll lose the daylight battle, I just decide to skip the run. But with the Maine Half Marathon next weekend, I thought I should try to get some miles in.

So I headed to the gym. Unfortunately.

Don't get me wrong... I really like the gym. I like the cross training. I like trying my hand at weights. I love people-watching.

But a gym run is not a relaxing run for me. With 17 television screens flickering in front of me, the whir of the cardio marchines and the chit-chat of gym buddies around me, I can't just lose myself in the run ... can't let my mind go and get into a rhythm where the miles pass easily.

In an attempt to drown out the gym sounds, I cranked my iPod last night and started out slowly on the treadmill. I couldn't believe when I looked down at the display screen and it had only been a little more than a mile.

I felt like I'd been running forever. And I was sweating like crazy.

I missed the smell of the fresh air, the sound of my feet hitting the pavement, the changing scenery and even the challenge of dodging cars driven by distracted drivers.

In the end, I got my four miles in -- and noticed that gym runners don't run as long as outside runners -- and felt good about not skipping that run.

I just hope not to have too many Hampster Wheel nights in my future.

A Rose By Any Other Name...

I took the step yesterday (no pun intended) and changed the name of this blog. I even tried my hand at a fancy new header, which I think turned out alright. (No, that's not my actual footprint, although I did just have a foot scan the other day.)

The name change was something I'd been considering for a while. My 'jog blog,' as a co-worker called it, seemed to have become much more than just a blog about running.

Disney 13.1 seems like something from another lifetime.

What started out as a way to chronicle my progress toward running my first half marathon seems to have gone in a new direction and touched on the ways that my life has changed since joining Team In Training.

I don't attribute all of the changes to taking up running, but I do think that running has helped me focus on me and the solitary hours on the road have really given me time to think about where I want to be in life, eventually.

I'm surely not saying I'm even close to having the answers, but step by step I'm getting closer.

Better Than Running In The Rain

Congrats to Kate and Colleen for raising $800 at their party this weekend by raffling off a case of wine. (I didn't win, darn it.)

Joining them at the party was more enjoyable than that morning's run -- when we questioned our sanity after waking up in the early morning hours to drive an hour for the team run in the remnants of Hurricane Gustav.

Already cold and wet, we ended up getting splashed by a passing car, which is probably when Kate changed from saying that I 'inspired' her to I 'dragged' her into the program.

On the bright side, at least the car wasn't driving through the overflowing sewage that filled the street near the start of the downtown loop.

Here's a pic of Kate and Colleen looking a little drier and awarding the winner the case of wine. Clean up nicely, don't they? (They don't smile that much while running.)

And here's a pic of me with a couple of people I don't really know...

The New Team

The new team started two weeks ago, training for the Seacoast Half Marathon and the Disney Full and Half Marathons. Thanks to Ken (who turns out to be my former neighbor) for taking this pic.

Turn Where?

Shawnna and Jack remind us to "turn after the lions" in the downtown loop. These photos were taken during Jack's birthday party at the Red Hook Brewery last week.

Life Happens

The last time I sat down to write, it was 22 days ago -- most certainly the longest I've gone since starting this blog just more than a year ago.

Things have been hectic, to say the least, and I've been dealing with the ups and downs of moving in a less-than-ideal situation, conflicts at work, a saddening break from Charming Friend and the realization that I won't be running the marathon in October.

All in the course of a couple of weeks. Phew.

Although I'm getting back on track, the process has been slow. (I was referring to my running, but it seems like an appropriate description of my whole life right now.)

I had a couple weeks of no running at all, then a few walk/runs, then eased back into the miles -- but I'm nowhere near where I was in my training and where I need to be to have a successful and enjoyable marathon.

I tried to convince myself otherwise for a while, kept telling myself that I'd be able to get back in time to run the marathon, but as the days ticked away (who's bright idea was it to put a countdown clock on here anyway??), I realized it wasn't going to happen.

It took me a while for it to settle in and for it not to seem like giving up or failure. I know I need to remind myself that there will be other marathons and plenty of time to get ready for them. There's no need to push it and end up hurting myself more.

So for now I'll just focus on getting better, taking care of myself and supporting my fellow teammates.

A Little Anniversary Perspective

It's officially been a year since I joined Team in Training. I didn't realize it until last night when, as I looked around the room at Info Night, I realized that the group was weighing their options between the same races I'd been considering at my Info Night.

I almost didn't go to last night's Info Night -- but after a twinge of guilt about blowing off the team run and Dave's team party this weekend, I decided I should.

And I'm really glad I did.

I've been feeling a bit overwhelmed during the past couple of weeks. (Here are the highlights:)

I signed a lease on a new condo and have been busy switching utitilies, get flooring estimates, picking paint colors, cleaning carpets. Not to mention the weekend of painting that kept me away from the team activities.

I close on my house in a couple of weeks after a much-too-long and emotionally draining process of moving forward with my life. It's involved a lot of calls back and forth with realtors, lawyers and visits to my therapist.

Needless to say, it's been a rough road and I'm just glad I can see the light at the end of the tunnel -- I just wonder why the bumpiest part of the road seems to be the end. And I have a feeling it's going to get worse before it gets better.

And packing up and moving? Yikes, it's going to be a lot of work. Moving is tough under the best of circumstances, but when you're unsure what even goes in 'your' boxes (and you have to go through a lawyer to ask what goes in 'his'), it's even harder.

I thought a vacation would be a great way to get away from some of these things, to take a break from reality for a week. My vacation, which was the first full week I've taken off from work in four years, was good -- until the accident on the last day (see my last post).

Granted, it could have been a lot worse. But the relatively minor accident has added phone calls to and from insurance companies, paperwork, a round of physical therapy and put a temporary delay in my training.

Lastly, my relationship with my Charming Friend seems to be a little 'off' since we returned from vacation, maybe a bit before. Things are just different. I can't quite pinpoint it and I might be worrying a lot about nothing (at least I hope so), but it's been on my mind. To be honest, I know I need to talk to him about it, but with everything else going on, I'm just not sure I'm ready for a talk like that. Just not with everything else going on. Maybe I'm afraid of what I'll hear.

Yep, I thought Iwas enduring a lot. I started to question why the heck I chose this time in my life to train for a marathon. I must be nuts. Was I just testing to see how much one person could take?

That's what I thought -- until last night.

I was prepared to hear a mentor, coach and TnT staff speak at Info Night. They'd say the same things I'd heard several times before -- it will change your life, people will donate, you'll make a difference, you can run that far. (All are true, by the way.)

I don't think I was prepared to hear the inspiring and tear-jerking story of Julie, a woman who completed the Maine Half Marathon last year. Julie wasn't the typical TnT runner. Well, she was 'typical' in the sense that she didn't come from a life of running and quesitoned whether she could do it.

What was different about her was her personal connection to the TnT cause. In a quiet and calm voice, which sometimes cracked on the verge of tears, she shared her story of being diagnosed with lymphoma at the age of 22, right after graduating from UNH and moving to North Carolina for her first real job.

The doctors were unsure of her prognosis and told her she wouldn't be able to continue working while going through vigorous treatment. She quit her job and returned to New Hampshire to start chemotherapy, determined to battle her illness.

Not long into her treatment, Julie suddenly lost her vision. She hoped it was temporary, but it turns out that it wasn't. Doctors weren't sure whether it was the cancer or the chemotherapy causing the vision problems. She debated heavily whether to continue treatment, knowing that stopping it would allow the cancer to spread. It was likely she wouldn't make it.

But she continued on, dealing with her her vision problems that left her with only about 1 percent of her vision and only able to see shadows and differences in light.

For 18 years, Julie lived as a cancer survivor. But she still felt a need to do something.

When she received a postcard for TnT, she found the answer. She'd run a half marathon and raise money in hopes that no one else would have to go through what she'd gone through.

The thought of anyone training for a half marathon is impressive. Raising money for a good cause while you're doing it is even better. But a cancer survivor with minimal vision signing up? It's almost unbelievable.

A few days later she ran into an old high school friend, who'd trained for a few long-distance running events, and the two began chatting about TnT. They decided to do it together.

Together, the pair ran all of the training runs -- and eventually across the finish line at the Maine Half Marathon. Her friend 'became my eyes,' guiding her along the running route, Julie told us last night.

When the two crossed the finish line, Julie told us, she finally felt back in control of her life. Getting control of mine doesn't seem nearly as difficult anymore... at least for the moment.